The Mysterious Old Man in the Rain
It was supposed to be an epic night—a party deep in the woods, music, laughter, and good times. But suddenly, the sky opened up, unleashing a torrential downpour. Thunder rumbled, lightning flashed, and two young guys sprinted through the rain, soaked to the bone, desperately trying to reach their car.
After what felt like forever, they finally made it. They jumped in, slammed the doors, and started the engine. Just as they pulled onto the road, the rain stopped, and they let out a relieved sigh.
But their relief was short-lived.
Out of nowhere, a wrinkled old face appeared at the passenger window, staring in. Then—tap, tap, tap.
“AAAAAAHHH! LOOK AT MY WINDOW!” the passenger screamed. “THERE’S AN OLD MAN STARING AT ME!”
The driver, gripping the wheel, yelled back, “Well, open the window a little and see what he wants!”
Terrified, the passenger hesitated before slowly rolling the window down just a crack. “W-what do you want?” he stammered.
The old man smiled faintly. “Got any tobacco?”
The passenger, still shaking, turned to the driver. “He wants tobacco!”
“Well, GIVE him a cigarette! Hurry!” the driver shouted, flooring the gas pedal.
Fumbling with his pack, the passenger handed over a cigarette and quickly rolled the window back up. As the car sped down the road at 80 mph, they burst into nervous laughter.
“What the hell was that?” the passenger asked, still catching his breath.
“I have no idea,” the driver admitted, gripping the wheel tighter. “I mean, how was he even keeping up with us?”
Then—tap, tap, tap.
The passenger’s blood ran cold. He turned his head—THE OLD MAN WAS BACK.
“AAAAAAHHH! HE’S HERE AGAIN!”
The driver, now in full panic mode, shouted, “SEE WHAT HE WANTS! SEE WHAT HE WANTS!”
Trembling, the passenger cracked the window open again.
“Yes??”
The old man smiled. “Got a light?”
Without hesitation, the passenger threw a lighter out the window and rolled the glass up so fast it nearly shattered.
Now pushing 100 mph, they drove in silence, trying to erase the memory of what just happened.
Then—TAP, TAP, TAP.
The passenger screamed at the top of his lungs, “OH MY GOD, WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW?!”
The old man grinned.
“You guys need some help getting out of the mud?”
Quick-Witted One-Liners for a Good Laugh
- My friend has a great watchdog. The moment he hears a suspicious noise, he wakes up the dog—so the dog can start barking.
- Ghost 1: “Hey, do you believe in people?”
Ghost 2: “Nah, that’s just a myth.” - “Where’d you get those big eyes?”
“They came with the face.” - “My wife has no idea what she wants.”
“You’re lucky—mine does.” - Me, calling room service: “Can you send up a towel?”
Hotel staff: “Please wait—someone else is using it.” - I thought about becoming a doctor.
I already have the handwriting for it. - My wife told me to get something that makes her look hot.
So I got drunk. - Daughter: “Mom, what’s it like having the most amazing daughter in the world?”
Mom: “I don’t know, ask Grandma.” - A study found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
- Life is all about perspective. The Titanic sinking?
A disaster for passengers, but a miracle for the lobsters in the kitchen. - An old lady at the bank asked me to check her balance.
So I gave her a little push. - “Will I lose my looks as I get older?”
“If you’re lucky.” - Thinking of changing my Facebook name to NOBODY.
That way, when people post dumb stuff and I hit like, it’ll say NOBODY likes this. - Doctor: “Any history of insanity in your family?”
Me: “Yes. My husband thinks he’s in charge.” - You’re not fat. You’re just… easier to see.
- What did one ocean say to the other?
Nothing. They just waved. - A bank will lend you money only if you can prove you don’t need it.
- Man: “I want to share everything with you.”
Woman: “Let’s start with your bank account.” - Job interviewer: “Can you handle a variety of work?”
Me: “Absolutely. I’ve had 12 different jobs in four months.”
Hope these gave you a good laugh! Which one’s your favorite? 😆
