A Lawyer and His Unconventional Bride

A Lawyer and His Unconventional Bride

A lawyer married a woman who had previously been divorced ten times. On their wedding night, she turned to her new husband and said, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.”

The groom, puzzled, asked, “How is that possible after ten marriages?”

She sighed and began to explain:

• Husband #1 was a salesman—he kept promising it would be amazing, but never actually followed through.
• Husband #2 was in software development—he wasn’t sure how it was supposed to work, but he said he’d troubleshoot and get back to me.
• Husband #3 was in field services—he ran all the diagnostics, but couldn’t get the system up and running.
• Husband #4 was in telemarketing—even though he had the order, he had no idea when he’d deliver.
• Husband #5 was an engineer—he had a complex plan but needed three years to research, design, and implement it.
• Husband #6 worked in finance—he thought he could do it, but wasn’t sure it was in his job description.
• Husband #7 was in marketing—he had great presentation skills, but didn’t know how to position himself.
• Husband #8 was a psychologist—he just talked about it endlessly.
• Husband #9 was a gynecologist—all he did was examine it.
• Husband #10 was a stamp collector—all he ever did was… well, let’s just say, I miss him.

She smiled at her new husband and said, “But now that I’ve married you, I know things will be different!”

“Oh really? Why’s that?” asked the lawyer.

“Because you’re a lawyer,” she replied. “This time, I know I’m going to get screwed!”