Sleeping Man:
Man: “I can’t sleep at night. I keep seeing donkeys playing football.”
Doctor: “I’ll prescribe you some medicine. Start taking it tonight.”
Man: “Can I start tomorrow?”
Doctor: “Why tomorrow?”
Man: “Because tonight’s the finals.”
The Blonde PE Teacher:
A blonde woman gets a job as a physical education teacher for 16-18-year-olds. She notices one boy standing all alone at the end of the field while everyone else is running around, kicking a football.
Feeling sorry for him, she decides to go over and ask, “Are you okay?”
The boy replies, “Yes.”
“You can go and play with the others, you know,” she says kindly.
The boy shakes his head and replies, “It’s best I stay here.”
“Why’s that, sweetie?” she asks.
The boy looks at her in disbelief and says, “Because I’m the goalkeeper!”
The 7-Year-Old Hockey Player:
During a hockey game, the coach calls one of his 7-year-old players over and asks, “Do you know what cooperation is? What being part of a team is all about?”
The little boy nods enthusiastically.
The coach continues, “You understand that it’s not whether we win or lose that matters, but how we play together as a team, right?”
The boy nods again.
“And,” the coach says, “when a penalty is called, it’s not okay to argue, curse, or attack the referee, right?”
The boy nods again.
“And when I call you off the ice to let another player have a turn, it’s not good sportsmanship to call your coach ‘a dumb a–hole,’ is it?”
The boy nods once more.
“Good,” says the coach. “Now, go over there and explain all that to your mother.”
