The Ex-Wife’s Hilarious Response
Dear Ex-Husband,
Getting your letter truly made my day!
Yes, we’ve been married for seven years, but a “good husband” is very different from what you’ve been.
Sure, I watch my soaps, but that’s because they drown out your constant complaining. As for your new haircut, I thought you looked like a girl—but I didn’t want to say anything unless I had something nice to say.
As for the pork dish you made—it must’ve been a mix-up with my lovely sister because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
And your new boxers? I didn’t mention them because I noticed the $49.80 price tag. Turns out, Carla borrowed $50 from me that same day.
But I still loved you. I wanted to make it work, and when I won $15 million in the lottery, I quit my job and bought us tickets to Hawaii. But when I got home, you were already gone.
I hope you get the life you always wanted. As for your letter, my lawyer says it means you won’t get a dime of my new wealth.
Take care,
Your Ex-Wife – Free and Rich
P.S. I should’ve mentioned—Carla was born as Carl. I hope that’s not an issue for you!
