The Never-Ending War
A man in Amsterdam confesses to his priest, “During WWII, I hid a refugee in my attic.”
“That’s not a sin,” the priest reassures him. “You helped someone in need.”
“But I charged him 20 Gulden a week,” the man adds.
“That wasn’t great, but you still saved his life,” the priest replies.
The man sighs in relief, then asks, “Do I have to tell him the war’s over?”
The man’s confession certainly wasn’t what anyone expected! Now, prepare for a workplace mishap that’s too funny to miss.
The Iron Phone Incident
Mark shows up to work with two red, sore ears. His coworker asks, “What happened?”
“I was ironing while watching TV. The phone rang, and I picked up the iron instead,” Mark explains.
“What about the other ear?”
“The guy called back.”
Mark’s phone mishap had us in stitches, but wait—this next one is a fast-food moment you won’t forget.
Sharing is Caring
An elderly couple walks into a fast-food restaurant, orders one burger, and shares everything—fries, drink, you name it.
A trucker feels sorry for them and offers to buy the wife her own meal. The husband politely declines, “Oh, no, thank you. We share everything.”
But after a few minutes, the trucker notices the wife hasn’t eaten. Concerned, he asks, “Why aren’t you eating?”
The wife replies, “Because I’m waiting for the teeth!”
Now that’s a creative way to share! But hang on, we’ve got a bat’s hilarious adventure coming your way.
The Blind Bat
A vampire bat returns to his cave covered in blood. The others ask, “Where’d you get the blood?”
He leads them through the forest and points to a tree. “Do you see that tree?”
“YES!” they scream.
“Good,” he says, “because I didn’t!”
This bat’s adventure will leave you in stitches. Next, we have a florist’s card mix-up that’s just too funny.
The Florist’s Card Mix-Up
A store owner gets flowers on the opening day of his business with a card reading, “Deepest Sympathy.” He calls the florist, who apologizes, “Sorry! That card was meant for the funeral home.”
The store owner asks, “What did the card say?”
The florist responds, “‘Congratulations on your new location.’”
Florists sometimes get things mixed up—but this lawyer’s tombstone mix-up takes things to a whole new level.
The Honest Lawyer
A lawyer named Strange orders a tombstone with the inscription: “Here lies an honest man and a lawyer.”
The stonecutter refuses, saying, “It’s illegal to bury two people in one grave. But I can write, ‘Here lies an honest lawyer.’”
The lawyer protests, “How will people know it’s me?”
The stonecutter replies, “They’ll read it and say, ‘That’s Strange!’”
We’ve had some clever wordplay, but now it’s time for a tale of extreme conditions with a surprising twist.
The Farmer in Hell
A Texas farmer ends up in hell after he dies. The Devil cranks up the heat to 105°F, but the farmer just smiles.
“This feels like a hot June day back home,” the farmer says.
Annoyed, the Devil freezes hell to -10°F, but again, the farmer just cheers, “The Cowboys must’ve won the Super Bowl!”
From a parrot outsmarting a burglar to a farmer making the Devil sweat, these stories are sure to leave you grinning from ear to ear.
