8. Bachelors
Two bachelors are talking about cooking. The first says, “I got a cookbook last year, but I couldn’t make anything from it.”
“Was it too hard?” asks the second.
“Totally!” the first guy says. “Every recipe started with, ‘Get a clean plate and…’”
9. Copy That?
A new worker asks a secretary how to use the office shredder.
She grabs his thick report and puts it in the shredder.
“Thanks,” he says. “But which side do the copies come out?”
10. Whoa, Amen!
A man gets lost in the desert and stumbles upon a house. The owner helps him, and as he leaves, the man asks to borrow a horse.
The owner says, “To make the horse go, say ‘Thank God.’ To make it stop, say ‘Amen.’”
The man hops on, yells, “Thank God!” and the horse starts walking. “Thank God, thank God!” the man shouts, and the horse picks up speed.
But then, he sees a cliff ahead. Panicked, he screams “Whoa!” and remembers, “Amen!”
The horse stops just at the edge. The man sighs in relief and says, “Thank God!”
11. Nutty Natter
A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. As he drinks, he hears a voice say, “Nice tie!”
Confused, he looks around. The voice continues, “I like your shirt!”
He asks the bartender, “Am I losing it? I keep hearing voices saying nice things, but no one’s here!”
“The peanuts,” the bartender says.
“What?” asks the man.
“The peanuts,” the bartender repeats. “They’re complimentary.”
These jokes are sure to bring some laughs to your day! Let us know which one made you chuckle the most!
