🎂 Age, Weight… and an F in What?!
A mom is driving her daughter to a playdate when the little girl suddenly asks, “Mommy, how old are you?”
“Honey, you should never ask a lady her age,” the mom replies. “It’s not polite.”
“Okay… then how much do you weigh?”
“Now really!” the mom huffs. “That’s personal and none of your business.”
The little girl, unfazed, fires off another question: “Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?”
“That’s ENOUGH questions!” the mom snaps.
Later, the girl complains to her friend, “My mom won’t tell me anything about her!”
Her friend grins. “Just look at her driver’s license. It’s like a report card—it has everything on it.”
That night, the little girl proudly announces, “Mommy, I know how old you are. You’re 32!”
Shocked, the mom asks, “How did you find that out?”
“I also know you weigh 130 pounds.”
Now the mom is stunned. “How on earth did you figure that out?!”
The little girl smirks. “And I know why you and Daddy got a divorce.”
The mom, now in full panic mode, asks, “Oh really? Why?”
“Because you got an F in s*x.”
😂😂😂
👩👧 White Hair = Mom Stress
One day, a little girl watches as her mom washes dishes. She suddenly notices a few white hairs standing out against her mom’s brunette head.
“Mommy, why do you have white hairs?”
Her mom sighs dramatically. “Every time you do something wrong and make me cry, one of my hairs turns white.”
The little girl thinks about this for a moment, then asks:
“So… how come ALL of Grandma’s hair is white?”
😳
🍽 Logan Knows What’s Up
The family gathers around the dinner table. As soon as little Logan gets his plate, he starts digging in.
“Logan, we say a prayer before we eat,” his mom reminds him.
Logan shrugs. “I don’t have to.”
“Of course you do,” his mom insists. “We always pray before eating at home.”
Logan grins and keeps chewing.
“Yeah, but this is Grandma’s house… and she knows how to cook.”
😂
